Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
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