When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
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