glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
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