Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
Randomize
