She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
So vagazzling was a success
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize