Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Randomize
