Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Randomize
