Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
