Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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