My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Everything about him screamed your future.
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
Randomize
