Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
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