Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Just rolled up to a matinee showing of THE HOBBIT. At the dollar theater. Alone. In sweats. With a fifth of sunnybrook and leftover pizza in a ziplock. There's a dude here in cape with his elderly mother. I'm handling this breakup FIIIIIINE.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
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