you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
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