i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
Randomize
