She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
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