do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
Randomize
