We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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