ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦ðŸ¼â€â™€ï¸
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
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