so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
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