i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
i dont even know how to be here
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
