can u get pink eye on your cock?
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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