sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize
