You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
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