Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
worst night to have a conscience
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
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