Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
