he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
