is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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