3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
Man, jail baloney is awful.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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