Dude I just picked up a married chick while her husband was playing pool.
What do you mean you picked her up? How are you gonna leave the bar?
I didn't. I fucked her in the men's room. Come get me before he finds out.
i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
I take back everything I said about communal showers
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Panties = found
Randomize
