i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
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