The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize
