Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
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