I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
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