dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Randomize
