We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
this will be a night to untag.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
