you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
This baby is an asshole
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
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