You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
Randomize
