i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
FUCK WHALES
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
Randomize
