I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
Randomize
