She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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