Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
apparently the secret to your success is patron
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Randomize
