I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
Randomize
