Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
Randomize
