ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
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