Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Randomize