Don't you send me to vm
Having your wife answer your cell was so lame. Maybe we can talk when you get your phone, your facebook account, and your balls back.
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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