if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
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