you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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