Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
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