he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
